Forever Young
I I called her one winter evening and asked permission to sing her a song. She agreed. She was silent as I sang Bob Dylan's Forever Young. When I finished we both cried silently. I really meant it and she knew I did.
She's gone now. Next month will be seven years. She may have left this world but in my mind and heart she will remain forever young. She's been on my mind a lot lately so I decided to dedicate this blog post to her and to the things she taught me.
I met Norma Kuras when she was seventy-eight years old. She had just moved to Israel with her eighty-eight year old husband. The first time I was in her home, I noticed a huge collection of stuffed animals on her bed. When I asked her about it, she replied with a smile, “They say we all age but who says you have to get old!?"
When she was eighty years old we began conducting weekly meetings to work on ourselves and increase our emunah (faith). During our first few sessions, I learned that in her late twenties she fought a life threatening illness. When she was in her forties she was challenged again with another life threatening illness. At age sixty-two she began keeping Torah and mitzvos. When she was seventy-five she was challenged with yet another serious condition.
Her life was spotted with enough challenges to bring anyone down and each time she bounced back.
At age eighty-one she asked me to call her by her Jewish name – Nechama Gittel. At eighty-two she asked me to join her on a trip to Uman (the final resting place of the great Chassidic master, Rebbe Nachman of Breslev). Shortly after we arrived home she was diagnosed with esophageal cancer. Less than six months later, she passed away.
Days before her passing, we were still studying together Rebbe Nachman’s teachings. It moved me to no end – this woman’s perseverance. From her hospital bed, she was still giving gifts and thinking of others. She was even planning to travel with me to Rachel’s tomb on my birthday – wheel chair, feeding tube and all. Two weeks before our scheduled trip she told me sadly that she didn't think she would be able to manage it. I made the trip on my own four days after she passed away.
During the two years we worked together, Nechama Gittel made life changing improvements in her relationships with herself, Hashem (the Creator) and her family. In that short time, she gobbled up everything Breslev she could get her hands on. Her thirst for learning, Torah, and the sincere desire to fix things in her life and do Hashem’s will was something I had never seen before nor have I seen since. It never seemed to be enough. She wanted more time, more Torah…always more and more.
She never stopped wanting to be better. She loved with all her heart and lived her life with unusual humility and dignity. She was very wise yet she had the sense of wonder and innocence of a child. She influenced my life immeasurably. Besides the books and jewelry she left me, I took with me the lessons of her life and pray that I too can meet the challenges with dignity and Truth. She taught me,
You are never too old to learn
and grow.
You are never too old to change.
There is always hope.
She was old enough to be my mother. There were thirty years between us. She was eighty-two and she was so much younger than me.
On the eleventh of Kislev 5771 (2010), Nechama Gittel bas Yaakov HaLevi and Chana left this world. May her memory be blessed and may her life’s teachings live on.
We can all do it. We can all Live our lives… live our lives as Nechama Gittel lived hers...
...and may we stay forever young,
MashaFaygel